The Violin and Singing Dog Joke

Little Peter was practicing the violin in the living room while his father was trying to read in the den. The family dog was lying in the den, and as the screeching sounds of little Peter's violin reached his ears, he began to howl loudly.

The father listened to the dog and the violin as long as he could. Then he jumped up, slammed his paper to the floor and yelled above the noise, "For Gawds's sake, can't you play something the dog doesn't know?!"

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What Dogs Can Teach Us

When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.

Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.

Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.

When it's in your best interest, practice obedience.

Let others know when they've invaded your territory.

Take naps and stretch before rising.

Run, romp, and play daily.

Thrive on attention and let people touch you.

Avoid biting, when a simple growl will do.

On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.

On hot days, drink lots of water and lay under a shady tree.

When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.

No matter how often you're scolded, don't buy into the guilt thing and pout ... run right back and make friends.

Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.

Eat with gusto and enthusiasm. Stop when you have had enough.

Be loyal.

Never pretend to be something you're not.

If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.

When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by and nuzzle them gently.

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Silly Dog Jokes

Q: What kind of meat do you give a stupid dog?
A: Chump chops!

Q: How many seasons are there in a dogs life?
A: Just one, the moulting season!

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs?
A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he still won't come!

Q: Why is it called a "litter" of puppies?
A: Because they mess up the whole house!

Q: How do you stop a dog smelling?
A: Put a peg on it's nose!

Q: What is the best time to take a Rottweiler for a walk?
A: Any times he wants to!

Q: When is a black dog not a black dog?
A: When it's a greyhound!

Q: How do you feel if you cross a sheepdog with a melon?
A: Melon-collie!

Q: What do you get if cross two young dogs with a pair of headphones?
A: Hush puppies!

Q: What do you call a litter of young dogs who have come in from the snow?
A: Slush puppies!

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